Alreet?

 I was flicking through 220 channels of shite on the T.V the other night and there were fuck all on so I put it on to a random music channel hoping for a bit of ambient background noise. Unfortunately there was a Girls Aloud (or girls a-shite as I call them) show on and they were interviewing the 5 members, fresh from Battersea.

I was shocked to discover that they all have completely different accents. Upon further research (wikipedia) I found out that they are from Newcastle, Bradford, Ireland, Linconshire and Liverpool.

Fuck me, the last time that many cross-cultures were in a room was for a United Colors of Benneton commercial.

I then thought, accents don't really show up in singing so why would I know this? I also started thinking how good it would be if music performers did actually talk the same way they sang. Ihad a little chuckle to myself at the examples that popped into my head.

• - Axl Rose.

  I can imagine this guy in everyday conversations talking with a high pitched winge, but also stretching the last word of every sentence out as long as possible whilst putting many unnecasary vowels in there:

  • "Can I get a Big Mac meal and a Quater pounder with cheese meal, both with diet coke and both with friiiiiiieeeeeeaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssss!!!"
• -Craig David
• This guy would still be working in a shoe shop, laying out his paragraphs like a metronome but, inadvertadely, trying to get as many words into the last sentence as possible.

"We only got these in a nine,

 but you want them in a ten?

i'll see what i can do for your pair of shoes rendevous at the checkout desk and i'll get some brown ones in a box for you..."

-The Beasty Boys

My personal favourite, and it's so easy to imagine. All they would do is shout the last words of each sentence.

"When do you want this write up doing SIR?"

"I can get on with it now and have it DONE BY TEN!"

I think this would be more effective if 2 of the work colleagues joined in in on the shouting.

Just an interesting, and somewhat amusing thought for you all, anyway.

Anyone else got any suggestions of pop stars who would sound stupid if they spoke like they sung? Let us know if so....

H.