Get this shit, my son who's nearly 2, is very much into Thomas the Tank Engine at the moment, which I'm cool with because I used to think it was pretty shit-hot when I was a lad. I can remember all the characters names and everything [smirks].

So we've been out and bought him some Thomas picture books and DVDs to keep him amused and I was shocked to find that, in pretty much every episode or story, one of the hapless trains de-rails causing "confusion and delay" (not my words, the words of the Fat Controller). Admittedly this does make for a good storyline or reading and i couldn't really think of anything else exciting that could happen to a train.

However, been so young, the boy is quickly getting bored of what we bought him so I find myself in desperate need of new material to amuse him.
Rather than Thomas the Tank Engine and his de-railings, i thought i'd treat him to some proper literature, a step up if you will, and I downloaded and printed off the government's investigations into the Potters Bar train crash, which killed 7 and seriously injured a further 70.

To my dismay, the boy didn't like the story, no matter how much detail I went into about the beheaded passengers and lost limbs and it actually gave him nightmares.

I mean come on, a de-railings a de-railing. Where do I draw the Fucking line????